The bitterness

By Nicholas Hooper

If only they would leave me alone,
those thoughts of what might go wrong.
At each turning there’s a threat, an injury.
This is the bitterness of life.
If only I could be free of ‘what ifs’,
free to live, breathe, enjoy every minute
of my finite life, in peace.

The bird calls, the wind shakes, the land turns,
and still I worry about what’s not there –
the future that I cannot know, only guess.
And what guessing that is:
always the worst outcome, always the drama-fail.
But will I die from this?

No, but I will die in the end.
Everyone does.
Is that my bitterness?
To lose all my time on wasted emergencies,
crying wolf to myself every day?
Live now, feel now, taste now,
and know freedom.



About Dawnings:
“Every morning at around 5am I get up and go down to my studio. After a short meditation I write down whatever is in my head, giving myself fifteen minutes to do so. Then moving over to the piano (or a more portable instrument like my Ukulele when I'm away), I improvise and record a piece of music inspired by whatever words I just wrote. It is a great way of keeping both my writing and my composing going and I call these small creations Dawnings. They are mostly unedited, like sketches, so that they keep that fresh feeling of an early morning discovery.”

— Nick Hooper