Dawnings

Waking useasy

By Nicholas Hooper

Have you learnt your lines?
Have you broken the law?
Is there a leak in the roof?
What’s that water on the floor?
Did I say the wrong thing?

Waking, forgetting where I am, for a moment,
leaves me with a feeling of unease.
Where did it come from
and why is it here now in my bones,
flowing through my bloodstream
like a torrent of errors?

But what have I done wrong?
Always that question.
Should I change something,
make a big change in my life?
Go off grid, off ‘piste’ like an errant skier?
Should I climb that impossible mountain?

No,
I had no lines to learn
I haven’t broken the law
I didn’t say anything wrong
I can stay here now
I can breathe here now
I can write here now
I can play here now.

And in that understanding
between me and myself
I can let go of the bad dream
and find my way home.

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About Dawnings:
“Every morning at around 5am I get up and go down to my studio. After a short meditation I write down whatever is in my head, giving myself fifteen minutes to do so. Then moving over to the piano (or a more portable instrument like my Ukulele when I'm away), I improvise and record a piece of music inspired by whatever words I just wrote. It is a great way of keeping both my writing and my composing going and I call these small creations Dawnings. They are mostly unedited, like sketches, so that they keep that fresh feeling of an early morning discovery.”

— Nick Hooper